For too long you’ve been told that you’re too sensitive, too emotional, too shy, too weird, too deep, too complex, too quiet, too different, too much of the vibrant living qualities that make you you and unique.

You might have heard it from your parents or caregivers or siblings when you were growing up. And even now you’re all grown up, you might still hear it from them. Maybe you heard it from friends, colleagues or bosses. You’ve most likely absorbed it from media, advertising and collective messaging.

Sometimes when I’m working a big growth edge in my life, I wake up feeling fear and dread in my stomach, mostly fear. When I feel intense feelings that I don’t like my old pattern is to get rid of it by pushing it away, ignoring it or dissociating from it. This was how I survived some overwhelming felt experiences in my childhood.

The problem is that these strategies may bring some temporary relief but they aren’t very effective in the long-term. Resisting any unwanted feeling tends to amplify it and can lock it in, especially if the feeling is coming from a young part of you that needs your holding and care and another part of you is pushing it away. Trying to ignore it on the other hand can lead to reactive behavior or disconnecting from the body you are here to inhabit and fully live through.

In this article I will explain:

1. the role your feelings play in your life and why they matter

2. what you need to know about tending to your feelings (and what not to do)

3. and how to become a safe space for you feelings so that you don’t get stuck in them and can discover the wisdom they may hold